Confidence issues

Discussion in 'General Royal Marines Joining Chit Chat' started by J20012001, Nov 19, 2018.

  1. J20012001

    J20012001 New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 27, 2018
    Posts:
    17
    App Stage:
    Passed Recruiting Test
    Alright lads, first of all i just want to thank everyone participating on this forum. It's a great way to gain an insight before doing PRMC and RT. As for my post I’m just looking for some advice regarding confidence, thing is, I’m really finding this part hard. I could tell at RMX it affected me and I really don’t want the same to happen at PRMC. It’s not even the jump into the net it’s just being confident when getting to know people, I’d be okay getting to know the lads I’d be in a troop with but with the training team and other lads that I’d probably find hard. I’ve always been the quiet kid and I’m worried that at PRMC they just deem me unsuitable for not showing enough controlled aggression and confidence. I really do want this lads and don’t plan on wrapping but this isn’t a night that goes by that a think up a scenario that could happen at PRMC. I just don’t want to be the guy who's really incompetent and everyone just sees me someone who will wrap early on. My question is lads is if any of you ever felt the same and if these thoughts are *text deleted* determine my outcome at the AFCO and while undertaking the PRMC. Thanks.
     
  2. allye

    allye Member

    Joined:
    Jun 18, 2018
    Posts:
    148
    App Stage:
    Passed PRMC
    Firstly it’s no longer the net punch it’s a different test which I’d say is miles easier.

    RT, and even the experience of PMRC itself will do wonders for your confidence, they are looking for potential and attitude, my experience of PRMC there is no testing of controlled aggression so don’t get hung up on that. With 40-50 lads on a course you’ll inevitably end up with blokes from all walks of life. We had cocky loud mouths to quiet reserved lads (Ironically, most of the cocky lads failed, majority of them on their 2nd attempt) let your physical performance do the talking, you don’t need to be an out going puffy chested hero.
     
    • Nailed It Nailed It x 2
    • Like Like x 1
    • Gen Dit Gen Dit x 1
  3. J20012001

    J20012001 New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 27, 2018
    Posts:
    17
    App Stage:
    Passed Recruiting Test
    Yeah I guess when it comes to it there just looking for who works hard. I'll just try to stay out of the training teams sights and try my best. Thanks mate that has given me alot of motivation.

    Also congratulations on passing PRMC, have you got an RT date yet?
     
  4. allye

    allye Member

    Joined:
    Jun 18, 2018
    Posts:
    148
    App Stage:
    Passed PRMC
    Spot on, as they say “be the grey man”. So get the job done without sticking your neck out.

    Yes I start a week today!
     
    • Like Like x 2
  5. Ninja_Stoker

    Ninja_Stoker .

    Joined:
    Jul 10, 2007
    Posts:
    32,602
    Spot on.

    I'm a shy person myself. When needed, I act the part of a confident person but humility is key and physical prep is the secret to passing PRMC.
     
    • Nailed It Nailed It x 1
  6. J20012001

    J20012001 New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 27, 2018
    Posts:
    17
    App Stage:
    Passed Recruiting Test
    Best of luck to you
     
  7. arny01

    arny01 Ex Pongo.

    Joined:
    Feb 15, 2015
    Posts:
    1,733
    Ye. Every part of your perceived lack of ability I shared at the early stage of my military career. Confidence was a huge issue for me and massively held me back! It was only in a military environment when I looked around and suddenly realised I was no worse than most of the other lads around me, the penny dropped.

    I think the only real way to develop confidence is to put yourself in uncomfortable situations and learn from them. If you never challenge yourself and stay within your comfort zone then you won’t develop as a person and certainly this will affect your confidence.

    Put yourself in challenging situations and learn from them.
     
    • Like Like x 2
    • Gen Dit Gen Dit x 1
    • Winner Winner x 1
  8. J20012001

    J20012001 New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 27, 2018
    Posts:
    17
    App Stage:
    Passed Recruiting Test
    After these replies I think I’m just *text deleted* try and get myself into the mindset of just getting the job done and having a good attitude. And thanks for the advice ninja much appreciated
     
  9. J20012001

    J20012001 New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 27, 2018
    Posts:
    17
    App Stage:
    Passed Recruiting Test
    Thanks arny, I used to do boxing for fun but I might go back get some confidence in me. And I’m honestly quite relieved I’m not the only one with these worries
     
  10. ThreadpigeonsAlpha

    ThreadpigeonsAlpha Royal Marines Commando

    Joined:
    Jul 20, 2015
    Posts:
    3,615
    App Stage:
    Not Applied Yet
    Had a read through this mate.
    https://www.royalmarines.uk/threads/confidence-issues.100185/

    You aren’t the first or the last person to question their confidence. Especially for joining the corps.

    Just got to take 1 step at a time.
     
    • Like Like x 2
  11. Chelonian

    Chelonian Moderator

    Joined:
    Aug 10, 2010
    Posts:
    5,428
    Don’t worry about “controlled aggression” and all that gubbins. You'll develop that discipline as your training progresses and your confidence grows.

    I’m assuming that there might have been some gobby individuals on the RMX you attended. Such behaviour is often an indicator of fundamental nervousness.

    As alluded to in the sound advice from others above, just be yourself and crack on to exceed the requirements at PRMC. Best of luck.
     
    • Like Like x 4
  12. J20012001

    J20012001 New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 27, 2018
    Posts:
    17
    App Stage:
    Passed Recruiting Test
    Will try my best and thank you for the advice, I’ve wondered about the aggression thing as they do say they don’t want a finished product. I guess I’ve got a few months to get prepared.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  13. A350-800

    A350-800 Member

    Joined:
    Jul 23, 2016
    Posts:
    313
    App Stage:
    Not Applied Yet
    I am not a marine and I haven't even put in my application yet so my advice, abilities and eloquence are rather limited but I think i can say I don't think you are alone in these feelings and lack of confidence.
    I feel much the same was as you about many of the things you mentioned. This forum has really helped me because there is lots of encouragement and information and I started a similar thread last year where lots of people kindly contributed, it really helped me and showed the royal marines is a really good thing to be a part of.
    I havent undertaken them yet so i dont speak from expeteince but PRMC and RT are evidently such massive challenges which will push the body and mjnd to their complete limits and i find they look completely impossible if you look at the whole 32 weeks in one go ( 32 weels probably feels like eternity at lynpstone but I guess it's a dauntingly short time to turn someone like me into a commando). They must be possible though because people do pass out of training and go on to enjoy their time in the marines.
    I find breaking my training and application down into manageable chunks and small steps and achieving little bits at a time help me to make some progress (people have suggested this already in this thread and I am sorry for repetition and the lack of originality of this advice but i felt tge need to say it again because it was adivce goven to me last year and it has really helped me so far with my training :) ) .
    Best of luck with your training and PRMC,
    I am sorry about the rather rambly structure of this post
    :)
     
    • Like Like x 2
    • Hoofin Hoofin x 1
  14. J20012001

    J20012001 New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 27, 2018
    Posts:
    17
    App Stage:
    Passed Recruiting Test
    I do feel the same as in this forum is a good way for people that worry a lot to test the waters and gain insight but then again after some consideration I think we’d have to be abit mad not to be Atleast a abit nervous. Recently I’ve been trying to think of the coming week rather than the PRMC and it has helped loads and every time I only get 30 press ups or 5 pull ups I don’t get those doubts of “no way I’m ever passing PRMC” rather I get the feeling of “I may not be ready yet but if week after week I push on I will eventually be ready” for Anyone worrying don’t worry I’m not going for prmc with those stats. That’s next year. But anyway thanks for your advice and best of luck to you too
     
    • Like Like x 2
  15. Chelonian

    Chelonian Moderator

    Joined:
    Aug 10, 2010
    Posts:
    5,428
    Agreed. Anyone purporting to have total confidence that they will pass a PRMC is perhaps lacking respect for the challenge. This in itself might be detrimental to a candidate's success.

    However, a candidate who adequately prepares and trains for their PRMC over months can attend knowing that they have invested the time and the sweat which are required to pass.

    A humble confidence should be maintained. The two words are not mutually exclusive! Focus on one's personal performance and don't let the perhaps sometimes exaggerated stats claimed by others undermine the investment made.
     
    • Like Like x 4
    • Hoofin Hoofin x 2
  16. J20012001

    J20012001 New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 27, 2018
    Posts:
    17
    App Stage:
    Passed Recruiting Test
    I think the best thing to do is just concentrate on ourselves rather than judge ourselves on the performance of others until where it matters on PRMC.
     
    • Like Like x 2
  17. J20012001

    J20012001 New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 27, 2018
    Posts:
    17
    App Stage:
    Passed Recruiting Test
    Then again constructive criticism is always welcome
     
  18. Chelonian

    Chelonian Moderator

    Joined:
    Aug 10, 2010
    Posts:
    5,428
    Some years ago a lad shared a PRMC diary on here. He commented that he met some other candidates on the train to Exeter St Davids and they got chatting about phys and stats. Some lads' stats were so apparently impressive that his confidence was knocked before he even arrived at CTCRM. On that specific PRMC one of the lads with apparently Olympian stats withdrew himself while another who also been given it big lips on the train performed no better than anyone else.
     
    • Like Like x 2
    • Hoofin Hoofin x 1
  19. A350-800

    A350-800 Member

    Joined:
    Jul 23, 2016
    Posts:
    313
    App Stage:
    Not Applied Yet
    Thankyou:)
     
    • Like Like x 1
  20. J20012001

    J20012001 New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 27, 2018
    Posts:
    17
    App Stage:
    Passed Recruiting Test
    To be fair the last thing I would want to do on the train down is to discuss stats because it would just add unneeded pressure. And thanks by the way I doubt I’m not the only one that finds this insight very helpful.