Exercise clowns

MAXPAIN

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I *text deleted* hear some of your funny moments while working out, whether it was while you was running or in the gym.

I'll start with mine, I was in the gym once trying out the bench press for the first time so i racked 80 kg on to the bar (*text deleted*), got in position to push the bar, I lifted it up it was all going well until I bended my elbows and 'POW' the the bar fell on my chest like a ton of bricks, I couldn't lift the bloody thing of my chest and I thought to myself 'arrr sh!t I cant die like this', so at this point I was yelling with the little amount of breath I had left, this one guy he was the size of the hulk came rushing and lifted the bar and started laughing. The gym was packed by the way, loads of hot chicks running on the treadmills, I felt so fking embarrassed I never tried a bench press since.
 

jm745

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Haha 80kg on a bar?
You pissed on your own chips there son.

Mine was probably this one time I took a banana on a 7 mile run to eat half way round,
just got into it and it started tipping it down,
bout 4/5 miles into it and I was running down a hill trying to peel and eat this banana with the rain beating down on me,
bits of banana were going everywhere,
looked a bit like that famous Jim'll fix it clip with them kids eating their lunch on a rollercoaster *text deleted*,
plenty of laughs and funny looks from people driving past.

Joe
 

Shibby

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when i first had an initial interview with an afco, i was told to get used to running in wet muddy clothes so i'd run down the canal paths in dpms and when ever i came across anyone coming towards me instead of moving out of the way i'd jump in the canal and run past them, used to get some funny looks especially when i'd fall over in the canal after suddenly being slowed down by waist deep water. I cant believe i never died from some horrible disease.
 

ZZ

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haha that banana thing is class. why would you want to eat half way through a run anyway?

well i have farted countless times when in the gym doing sit ups.. pretty funny because i let out one of the silent but deadly buggers and i move off quickly and watch as the person who was next to me gets the dirty looks from the next fella who comes along to do some sit ups *text deleted*
 
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marcsteele08

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well i have farted countless times when in the gym doing sit ups.. pretty funny because i let out one of the silent but deadly buggers and i move off quickly and watch as the person who was next to me gets the dirty looks from the next fella who comes along to do some sit ups *text deleted*

Lmfao, could just imagine it, done it myself a couple of times haha.
Apart from that, nothing else :(.

Marc.
 

MT6690

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ive got a stupid 1 *text deleted*. me and my *text deleted* Finch were running on a near by uphill hill country route i discoverd. we were half way up and i noticed these two women snugling in a fiel 2 meters away...we looked at each other and thort...hell yeh, we carried on to the top, looked back down and they were taking photos of each other. we thort *text deleted**text deleted* this we'r going up and down this allnight...so we did *text deleted* up and down, up and down and just constantly watching these lesbiens doin wierd stuff, *text deleted*...if you wondering, we didnt even get a look... *text deleted*.

:rally_drive:
 

rusty92

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Lesbian One!.. Hahaha thats class.. Id of been running around with a huge lump in my shorts :cheesy: :laugh::laugh:
 
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Natasha Cohen

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Verbal rubbish!

Listen - verbal rubbish *text deleted* I am down ok? - May aswell laugh about something!

This is nothing to do with the gym but funny nevertheless!

I was 17 years old at this time! Hey - Me and my mates were invited to a Toga party! This was a proper hooray henry party! Anway - We worked on our outfits for weeks. I had white sheets (as you do) and I aztecked them in silver paint - you know! Added the whole monte carlo! Gave this loads of thought you know. It was one of them where we were staying at each others houses and fobbed off our folks where we were! We were totally out of our depth believe me! Big huge mansion house in Chester with proper hoorays - we were so out of our depth but very brave!

Anyway - Toga party it was! We looked the dogs! I had an amazing outfit with plastic belt and gothics sandals etc. Huge mansion house in Chester - We were toga-ing and eating strawberries like going out of fashion but they were injected with vodka. I was only 17 then. I was bolloxed. The next thing I remember I fell into an huge and I MEAN HUGE open fire - I just lit up - I was so badly burnt I had to get an ambulance to Countess of Chester Hospital. I was very badly burnt to the extent I was on gas and air all night! I was in hospital for six weeks. My dad dropped a bollock!! I had to lie on my front for six weeks believe me - so badly blistered and almost branded! However, I was out of action for a while but OK now. No complaints anyway!

God was I in trouble!! Sorry to bore you all - just trying to cheer myself up!

Natasha x
 

Charlie

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Listen - verbal rubbish *text deleted* I am down ok? - May aswell laugh about something!

This is nothing to do with the gym but funny nevertheless!

I was 17 years old at this time! Hey - Me and my mates were invited to a Toga party! This was a proper hooray henry party! Anway - We worked on our outfits for weeks. I had white sheets (as you do) and I aztecked them in silver paint - you know! Added the whole monte carlo! Gave this loads of thought you know. It was one of them where we were staying at each others houses and fobbed off our folks where we were! We were totally out of our depth believe me! Big huge mansion house in Chester with proper hoorays - we were so out of our depth but very brave!

Anyway - Toga party it was! We looked the dogs! I had an amazing outfit with plastic belt and gothics sandals etc. Huge mansion house in Chester - We were toga-ing and eating strawberries like going out of fashion but they were injected with vodka. I was only 17 then. I was bolloxed. The next thing I remember I fell into an huge and I MEAN HUGE open fire - I just lit up - I was so badly burnt I had to get an ambulance to Countess of Chester Hospital. I was very badly burnt to the extent I was on gas and air all night! I was in hospital for six weeks. My dad dropped a bollock!! I had to lie on my front for six weeks believe me - so badly blistered and almost branded! However, I was out of action for a while but OK now. No complaints anyway!

God was I in trouble!! Sorry to bore you all - just trying to cheer myself up!

Natasha x

cant beleive you did that!!

*text deleted*

cheered me up anyway ! :applaus:
 

Mavrick1664

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owwww, that musta hurt, haha, props for beatin me in the fallin down while *text deleted**text deleted* faced competition tho, down stairs an into bushes i think top my list, its more what i get up to deliberately whilst intoxicated that i regret in the mornin!! but *text deleted* a bit more towards the topic of conversation, i was on a wee run, bimbling along the road when i noticed a group of girls on the other side of the road were all whistlin at me, i was like, hey, how u doin, then proceded to run face first into the side of a bus shelter, made it look like i meant it tho,haha!
 
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Natasha Cohen

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That sounds ace!

Hey - I am trying hard not to annoy you guys *text deleted* this is so masculine a website!

Anyway - I couldn't resist telling you my toga story. I have more believe me - totally traumatised as a young girl believe me.

You have to laugh haven't you?

sorry I am trying to get high on missing my Buster!

Tasha x
 
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Natasha Cohen

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Maverick - What are you like?

Come on!! Face on to a bus shelter!!
 
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Natasha Cohen

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natasha cohen

Hey - Live the dream! God - i couldnt sit down for six weeks though!

So bad!! I had to pretend to my folks it was OK but really it wasnt!
 

Mavrick1664

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yea i know, but i was young an niave at the time, i'm old enough to know better now, now i'd just cross the road an c how they were doin,haha!! it's good to c ppl when *text deleted* out trainin tho, often i have been hangin out and thinkin, christ i need to stop an get a breath, then some civvies round the corner an i'm like, f*text deleted**, i cant stop now an look bad,haha!!
 
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Natasha Cohen

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Cheer me up!

I am a traumatised girl here!! I was born into a totally mans world!

Anyway I have two older brothers and a sister - they are such buggars. They tortured the living daylights out of me! Anyway - I fought so badly with my two older brothers to the extent where we were vicious! I was 16.

Anyway - we lived in tihs lovely nosey village where everyone knew everyone and if they didn't they made it up! We lived at the very top of an elevated street where it looked out onto the F*text deleted**text deleted*g world and their dog!

I had mass murder this day over the bathroom with my bro's. They were a few years older than me - I wass 16. We lived in one of them houses where the front window was 17ft wide and long and elevated over the whole village!

Needless to say - bathroom argument. I got my own way and pigged out on hot shower water. When I came downstairs to give them both verbal they whipped the towel off me, grabbded an arm and a leg each and held me in front of the fu*text deleted**g window for all the pervs and their dogs to see! I have never got over it all my life. What a pair of B*text deleted**ds!!

I cant get married for so many reasons !!
 

Mavrick1664

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pervs musta loved it, dunno bout their dogs tho dont think theyd care,haha, sorry, shouldnt laugh, hey i'm the oldest of four, i have 3 younger sisters man was a nightmare, apart from constanly fightin havin to stick up for them *text deleted* its *text deleted* job when u have sisters, they r the most annoyin little *text deleted**text deleted*s but apparently i should know better, arrgggg, i'm 25 now they still do my nut in,haha!!
 
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Natasha Cohen

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Hey I know

Really bad isn't it! You guys are so funny!

Sorry for all the banter! Just not looking forward to going home to an empty house! I hate CHAVS!
 

Touchstone

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Okay now some good story here.

I was doing leg press once with 7 x 20kg plates a side (140kg total). Usually I am fine with this weight but something in my legs just gave up and as I bent my legs to lift the weight they just collapsed and the weight went crashing down on me. There I was sitting there with my knees bent all the way up to my chest supporting all this weight. A guy a was just *text deleted**text deleted*ing sitting there looking at me not bothering to help, luckily a mechanism prevents the weight from going all the way down and crushing me *text deleted* so I managed to crawl out of that one feeling quite embarrassed.

Here's a pic of the leg press machine -



Another time I was running on the treadmill, someone said something to me and I turned my head to the side, lost balance and went crashing down onto the floor and hurt my arms quite badly.

Now this person in my class from college was a complete *text deleted*er who said he was joining the Army and how great an athlete he was, telling me he could bench 30kg a side even though he had never benched before and that he was a marathon runner. So I took him to my local gym to see how much he could lift, *text deleted**text deleted* he struggled lifting the bar with no *text deleted**text deleted*ing weight on, not surprising with those skinny chicken arms. Then I proceeded to the treadmill, I put it on level 10 incline than *text deleted**text deleted*ing ran for 20 minutes. I put the same settings on for him and within a few minutes he was grasping for breath and proceeded to vomit in the toilet! He could never live it down.
 
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