Please please urgent help needed please!


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Nov 10, 2008
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Hello can you help me please?? I am desperate for some help... my boyfriend went on his prmc and wasn't too sure about joining but he joined today *text deleted* he didn't want to always wonder. He hates it and is so upset and just wants to come home, he is 100% sure he wants to leave asap but didn't realised he had signed to be "theres" for 28 days so he asked the corporal about how to go about leaving who said "he was theres" for 28 days..... unless he appeals, what can he say in his appeal to ensure he gets released please please help me i am desperate!! Please :0)


Feb 21, 2007
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Please don't spam the forum Lizzie, no matter how many times you post for advice, he isn't going to get out tonight.

As for not realising he is there for 28 days, that is impossible. The amount of times you are warned by the careers office and before you give the oath at Lympstone about being there 28 days is endless. Maybe 40 years ago it would have happened but not today.

First question is how old is he, because that may make a difference?

Secondly, a lot of people hate it for the first few days, that's the reason for the 28 days, because once the shock wears off, it's enjoyable.

Best thing he can do is exactly what his Drill Leader (Corporal) says. If he says to appeal, unfortunately then that is what he going to have to do.

My advice would be tell him to relax, it gets better once he gets to know the others in his troop and tell him 28 days is nothing, it's 2 weeks work and then he puts in his 2 weeks notice to leave.


Jul 10, 2007
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Again this is an illustration of the need for support from your nearest and dearest during recruit training and there is much sympathy afforded to those having doubts initially.

Everybody joining has reservations and feels homesick initially, understandably and most individuals are advised that the contract states a minimum of 28 days before you may leave unless under exceptional compassionate circumstances.

Given that he's been there less than 24 hours, it would help if he was given support from his family & partner telling him to stay rather than jump ship and in most cases individuals are advised to at least give it a few days to settle in. They will find that everyone else feels the same initially, they will make new friends, start to have a laugh, relax a little and then view things with a little more composure.

A tearful phonecall on the first night is not really helping anybody & I'm sure some of the parents of those joining will freely admit that although they wanted to tell their sons to come home when they were feeling down, but had to put on a front and tell them to stay- even if that's not what they felt like saying.

The mechanics of discharging someone early on in training are long established and best left to those who are expert at dealing with it. When someone has the tunnel vision and mindset they must leave at all costs, despite the advice & support they are being offered, then the last thing they are considering is the laughable thought of rejoining if they leave.

Rest assured a very large majority percentage of those that do leave for the sake of their partner regret it, as do their partners. Every other Monday at the AFCOs somewhere in the country there are usually former recruits who have left the service. Their first words are: "I made a mistake". The answer is usually: "You did". If you are discharged unsuitable during training during the first 4 weeks the odds of re-joining are at best slim, with a minimum caveat of 12-24 months before you are even considered.

Best of luck to him & indeed you, whatever he choses - try to encourage him to stay for 3 weeks so that you may see him in uniform on Families Day.