Discussion in 'Jollies Bar' started by Ninja_Stoker, Jun 23, 2014.
While Meghan returned to Canada Harry had his 1st try at being financially independent
A cat died and went to Heaven. God met the animal at the Pearly Gates and said, “You have been a good cat all of these years. Anything you want is yours for the asking.”
The cat thought for a moment and then said, “All my life I lived on a farm and slept on hard, wooden floors… I would like a real fluffy pillow to sleep on.”
God said, “Say no more.” Instantly, the cat had a HUGE fluffy pillow.
A few days later, 12 mice were simultaneously killed in an accident and they all went up to Heaven together. God met the mice at the Gates of Heaven, with the exact same offer that He made to the cat.
The mice said, “Well, we have had to run all of our lives… from cats, dogs, and even from people with brooms. If we could just have some little roller-skates, we would never have to run again.”
God answered, “It is done.” All the mice had beautiful little roller-skates.
About a week later, God decided to check on the cat… He found her sound asleep on her fluffy pillow. God gently awakened the cat and asked, “Is everything okay? How have you been doing? Are you happy?”
The cat replied, “Oh, everything is just WONDERFUL… I’ve never been so happy in my life! My pillow is always fluffy and those little “Meals-on-Wheels” that You have been sending over are delicious.”
Read more: http://civviestreet.proboards.com/thread/67860/cat-died-went-heaven#ixzz6AomQCMhg
You know you’re a military mum when you talk about your son getting dirty magazines and you don’t get what everyone is laughing about.
You need to buy him some wifi, it will really knock his socks off
Speeches prior to going on leave. This one courtesy of the Guards!
Going for a piss, when it's -10 degrees. Alot of things to laugh at there
Holy Jeez - 12 years?
No messing in Mississippi.
Pinched from FB:
Pinched from Ducati's FB page.
A jeans look familiar to anyone who has crashed off a big, fast bike. But I suspect that this bloke acquired his exquisitely curated jeans from a stylist.
One of the girls at the offsprings dance class asked him 'so when are you off to the maroons?'
Global Warming in Dorset!
Quick dip in fresh water lake......
Is that Dorset or Middle Earth!?
Dorset is Middle Earth!
Separate names with a comma.