Take a deep breath and relax. Our car key replacement cost guide has all the information and costs you need when your car keys are lost or broken.
£500,000 is only 3,597 car keys at the cheapest end of the scale, £139. At the other end of £252, it's only 1,984 car keys.
If it was 3,597 keys, over seven days, they'd need to test 21 keys an hour, non stop, or 63 an hour if they're doing an 8hr work day.
After a decade in the corps, I've done some pretty pointless jobs, so I wouldn't even blink twice at being told to find the right key. In fact, I'd have walked through the door, seen the keys and already know what was about to happen.
I spent far too long thinking about this but after much thought, this is what I would do.
Immediately from that moment, they have jurisdiction everything my whole identity, my bank information my texts, and emails are now in the power of them. Everything I do is being tracked so I won't give any information at all to anyone.
First of all, I will write in a notebook my fake plans on what I will do with the key. I will rip the page out and burn it. Now here is when the plan unfolds. Whenever you write anything it leaves a mark on the next page. I will purposely leave that book out for them to find. They will send the book back to the lab so they can see what I wrote, from the indentations and they will think they are one step ahead of me. The results would come back in with my fake plan. The fake plan would be smart enough to be believable, but a plan in which it would take a few days to actually execute. The whole detectives think they are being smart@sses, being too clever for me when actually they are being tricked. I will then have planned months beforehand for a stranger to call in an anonymous tip saying they overheard the plan that was written in the notebook, to ease any doubts in the detective's mind.
So where are the keys when they are frantically looking somewhere where the keys aren't actually at? First of all, I wrap them in foil assuming it was an electric car key, they emit some some sort of signal that enables the detectives to find the keys. Wrap them in foil and according to a fbi agent, you can no longer detect this signal. I would then get a metalsmith to make me some fake primal 50kg weights and implant the key in there. 1 year beforehand I would have made sure I brought some primal 50kg weights, and the detectives would know that because they would have searched my internet history and bank statements, etc extensively. To make the weights I would make sure they melt down the metal from the actual weights, as they are detectives they would probably check the metal make as well. If they get suspicious about the weights then cutting into them would be a tiresome process.
Geez I have spent way too much time thinking about this. Time to go to bed ha ha